i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
