Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Randomize
