The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
