Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
