yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
