its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
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