Me too!
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
It's official drugs can't kill me
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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