i jhust puked up my retainher.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize
