Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize