Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
