its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
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