That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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