Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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