sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize