just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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