Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
