I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
