Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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