hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Randomize
