He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Randomize
