At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
3pm strippers are depressing
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
