TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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