I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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