just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize