if i died would you start the facebook group?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
