i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I'm too high and old for this...
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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