im having a threesome with these popsicles
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
