Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
