hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
