D3 body, D1 cock
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
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