i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
