he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
