I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
just tell him i said nine months
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
When are your genitals available?
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
