I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
