Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
