ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
