We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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