I think im going to throw up on grandma
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
