I can tuck mytits in my pants
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Randomize
