After last night, I could never be a politician.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
porn star boner night. come get it.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
