physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize
