just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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