that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
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Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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