everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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