dude i'm inner monologue high
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Randomize
