Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
