I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
