I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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