I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
