Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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