his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
i am craving dick and cupcakes
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